Verses for The Broken

Eponine

Pearls of melancholy,

diamonds of despair:

jewels of solitude, my love,

that every day I wear.

How near you are to this lone soul

and yet so out of reach:

you hear not these sad serenades,

nor paeans, nor love's speech.

You feel not this warmth from inside

that keeps my dreams aglow,

nor smell the blooming buds of hope

that years have left to grow.

You know not of my heartbreak

nor see these cheeks tear-stained.

Loveless and lifeless am I, my sweet,

For I love thee in vain.

No, I totally do not relate, dammit. :'''''(

What I got around to doing

Biolec: about 3 hours of (incomplete) note-taking. :| Dear Lord, please don't leave me to the dogs. Not yet. >_<
AABE poster: Yay at 1:20 AM!
Biolab: stare at notebook.
Chem: nothing.

In other fields of life:
[x] Think up a storyline for devotion to a religious image
[x] Worry about PI short story
[x] Chastise myself for all my wrongdoings and shortcomings today
[x] Rediscover the foundations of my beliefs

There. So much for a productive weekend.

Oh, and this:

I hope I don't let it go to waste/ distract me from what I should be doing with my life (eg. studying for upcoming quizzes).

Terribly grotty attempts at being masipag. :|

Days like this wonderful (see sarcasm drip) Wednesday morning make me wish I were Valhallen instead.

So instead of making up reports about common ions curbing the degree of ionization of X, Y, and Z at three in the morning, I could be shredding my Axe *accent here* and marveling at my pristine locks *accent here too* and totally practicing my wonderful Cali-surfer accent/profound vocabulary.

Or like, feasting on golden apples of Idunn with some fair maidens at an Asgard afterparty.

Because it was substantial on its own. I just had to.

Make Patty happy! Get her any one of these items/invite her over for some fun bonding time/drop her a line, and the world will surely become a better, more awesome place. Patty wants---NEEDS--- to break away from all the academic stuff.

THE SUMMER WANT LIST!

1. A retro radio/portable turntable

2. Beach Boys all summer long!

Especially this guy. :"> :"> :">
Dennis Wilson early in his career/before he became a hippy.

3. Big stack of old Archie comic books. See previous post!

4. Road trips, and lots of 'em.

Bataan, done! More please.

5. Vinyls, vinyls, vinyls. I'm not really choosy-- I would greatly appreciate a collection of waltz tunes just as much as a Revolver.. I'd like to think that you gave it some thought.

While we're on the subject of vinyls I appeal to our Beatles LPs: PLEASE COME HOME. We love you and we miss you so. It breaks my heart to think you're somewhere out cold, dark, and alone (or stuck together in misery). We love you! Come hoooome! :((((

6. Summer loving. Of course I had to bring this up. It's Grease!

I think I saw this movie  10+++ times in Pisay first year alone.

7. Tortoise Ray Ban wayfarers. Just a whim.

8. World peace, just in case you don't know I want it. Phillips SHE2650 earbuds. Mine recently broke. :((

9. A DECENT VACATION (with all the trimmings), else

10. An uno in Chemistry. >:) HAHAHA I am such an evil genius.

Have a great Friday! :D

"Summertime in Riverdale", or "The Summer I Wish I'm Having"

The Betty and Veronica August 1985 issue sitting on my study table is making me so jealous. I love love LOVE Archie comics, especially when summer rolls around! They give me the feeling of sand between my toes, ice-cold Coke drowning out the heat, and a red, retro radio playing endless Beach Boys tunes all day long.

But I'm just not feeling it now. Here. In front of my PC at 2am, struggling with two Chem labreps. Nooooo.

Chemistry classes inside a hot, stuffy laboratory on a bright, sunny April day is definitely not a happy summer thought.

If you're happy about your birth order, scroll past this one.

Did you know that first-borns were invented so that dads could show the younger kids who's boss? So that moms could tell them how their day had been without being interrupted. So that younger siblings would know what not to say, do, ask, or wear. So that there'd be someone to blame. Someone to test the waters. Someone to lecture about. Someone to make the mistakes that are too embarrassing, heartbreaking, or just plain stupid.

First-borns were invented to gauge the risks and see if the results are worth the gamble. They are prototypes of what a proper kid ought to be, or what a proper kid ought NOT to be. They may storm into their rooms and not eat dinner with the rest of the family, but they probably just ran out of batteries. They don't cry into their pillows late at night, when everyone else is asleep. They don't feel hurt when you call them names. And of course, they don't want the last slice of pizza.

You can count on your first-born to do schoolwork on a Sunday even if she hasn't had a weekend for the past month. She does not get annoyed when you barge into her room and rummage through her things. Best of all, she does not get scarred when you make her feel guilty of something she didn't really do. We cannot live life as we know it without first-borns. We cannot survive the cruelty of reality if not for them. The world is a safer, happier, less embarrassing one for the rest of humanity, thanks to this brilliantly unbrilliant invention.

First 2012 post!

I woke up to a text message saying classes would resume tomorrow instead of Wednesday. I jumped out of bed before I could even yawn. @_@ Hello, 2012! I am serving up a plate of cramming with a side of hopelessness for breakfast. :)) But I sure hope (and pray) the rest of the year won't be like this day. [-o<

I didn't mean for that to rhyme. @-)

Here's to rollickin' good fun this year, ol' chaps!

Moment of truth

I have this very very awesome friend (ehemninoganaehem) who has a knack for writing blog posts that could pass for formal, legitimate contest/Reader's Digest essays. A few days ago he wrote yet another profound entry. I came across his post tonight, and a part of it reached right out of the screen and slapped me--- hard.

Life isn't about waiting for the stars to align, giving you the perfect opportunity; it's about seizing every opportunity as it presents itself. It's about chasing your dreams without fear of failure, knowing that if you do fail, it isn't the end of the world. It's about taking chances, taking risks, knowing that doing so gives you a chance at creating more cherished memories, regardless of whether you succeed or not. It's not all about the destination, but the journey that leads you there.

It struck my heart at its most vulnerable part: the soft, squishy part I-want-to-play-safe-because-I'm-scared-of-losing-the-gamble part that's always nagging me to think twice, survey all options, bottle everything up.

I always thought of this as something I'd have to live with forever. When I was a kid there was an old Portuguese lady (my dad's best friend's mother) who read Tarot cards and interpreted astrological stuff. Every Christmas we'd be at their house (Ninong ko kasi yung best friend ng dad ko), and time and time again she would ask me my birth date. I was born on the 25th day, which gives 7 as my something-significant number. She said I was a practical person, segurista. I have always justified my check-all-options, ask-for-opinions-first habit with the number 7 and its 'consequent' attitudes. In short, all my life I've played safe. I have never played in the rain, stepped out of a line, or told someone I've been in love with them for the past year and a half unless I'm completely sure I won't end up sick/empty-handed/heartbroken.

And then this guy (or his post) comes along and tells me I should take chances and forget about failing. My gahd, all my life I wanted to learn just that. But how? I have so many doubts, so many fears, so many second-guesses.

If I play in the rain will I end up with loads of fun or a bad fever?

If I step out of the line will I get a better seat or lose my ticket?

If I tell someone I care deeply about them will they freak out and turn me away, or be kind enough to pretend I never said/they didn't hear anything? (hahahaemokid)

If I jump in, what awaits me? If I do not, how will I ever know?

So many questions, so little time. :<

Thank you, 9gag.

...has not yet happened to me. Hahahahaheartbreak. ._.

Can't get over how cool (and sometimes tautological) this is

 SHE BELIEVED.

I'm losing you

So I reeeeeally feel like crying right now, but as usual I am too tired. I spent the day at a baptism then went straight to Tutorlink and taught for three straight hours.. and then this heartbreaking moment: the realization that (maybe) I'm a failure at trying to keep old friendships, or at least nurture them. <///3

I think I'm losing you, and it's making my eyes rain and my heart break into a million little pieces too microscopic to childishly put together with a bit of white glue.. or any other (sticky) means, for that matter. :(

*One big sigh.*

Heartache tonight, I know.

This ain't a post for the brokenhearted

Sir Martin's FB post led me to read the 'Strangers on a Bus' article. And it made me feel so kilig for the author and so bleh for myself. Why can't love just pop up in my life like that? :))

This pretty much sums up my perception of love (and most other things).

from a more Joseph Gordon-Levitt (read: pessimistic) point-of-view,

But hey! This is just a PrntScrn of the bad days, the ones where (s)he decides things ain't gonna work between you and her/him because (s)he likes Chocolate Bittermelon-flavored Jelly Bellys and you don't love 'em as much. Don't get me wrong, I still believe in the idea of thoughtful, understanding, funny, retro guy who would someday knock on my paper-strewn desktop and offer to share burger and fries (and the rest of his life) with me. I do believe in fairytales, I do, I do.. I just think we all have a tendency to Disney-fy relationships more often than needed. :))